Being Introverted is Not a Problem

I just watched this interesting TED talk about introverts like me.  The speaker, Susan Cain, outlines how the mostly extrovert-orientated modern world could make better use of our talents, and how extroverts could benefit from a little introversion every now and then.

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Posted on July 14, 2014, in Uncategorized and tagged , , . Bookmark the permalink. 44 Comments.

  1. introverts are national treasures!

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  2. Reblogged this on sondasmcschatter and commented:
    I AM AN EXTROVERT– & ALWAYS HAVE BEEN & FOR MANY REASONS– BEING AN EXTROVERT–ALSO LEAD ME TO HAVING BUSINESS PLANS & STARTING MANY DIFFERENT BUSINESSES OVER THE YEARS– THAT WERE SERVICE TYPE BUSINESSES FROM BEAUTY SALONS– TO LODGING TO ANTIQUE SHOPS — ETC- ETC– I ALWAYS WORKED AT HELPING OTHER PEOPLE– & NOT ONLY IN BUSINESS– BUT WAS ALWAYS THE CAREGIVER FOR EVERYONE ALSO!! NOW THAT MY MCS IS AT THE LEVEL IT IS– & HAVING TO LIVE IN AN MCS SAFE HOME & NOT ABLE TO LEAVE MY MCS SAFE HOME OFTEN– I REALIZE MY BLOG IS MY WAY OF STILL DOING A SERVICE & STILL BEING A CAREGIVER & ALSO KEEPING ME SANE– AS I STILL AM ABLE TO HAVE CONTACT WITH OTHER PEOPLE EVEN IF IT IS THROUGH THE INTERNET!!! WHEN I GREW UP & REMEMBER MANY PEOPLE I KNEW & ALSO TEACHERS–GIVING ME THE IDEA& FEELINGS –THAT BECAUSE I WAS AN EXTROVERT– I WAS NOT AS SMART OR AS TALENTED– AS THE QUIET INTROVERTS. IT TOOK ME A LONG TIME TO REALIZE I WAS AS SMART & AS TALENTED AS THESE QUIET PEOPLE WHO READ ALL THE TIME– & DIDN’T GET DIRTY & DIDN’T RAISE HELL– AS I DID SOME TIMES!!! BEING AN EXTROVERT WAS OK— AS IT WAS ME– & IT WAS OK TO ME BE!!!!!

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    • YOU’RE AN EXTROVERT SONDA? I NEVER WOULD HAVE GUESSED. 😉
      IT’S INTERESTING THAT EXTROVERTS ARE MADE TO FEEL BAD ABOUT BEING EXTROVERTS. I THOUGHT IT WAS JUST INTROVERTS. SO EVERYBODY IS SUPPOSED TO FEEL BAD ABOUT WHO THEY ARE, HUH? EVERYBODY NEEDS TO CHANGE, NOBODY’S GOOD ENOUGH. WHAT ABSOLUTE CODSWALLOP! 🙂 VIVE LA DIFFERENCE, I SAY.
      I LOVE EVERY LITTLE EXTROVERT BIT OF YOU SONDA. 🙂

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  3. I agree! My daughter and I read her book. Really interesting how our culture prizes extroverts. Not all cultures do this.

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    • My family used to read books together but we don’t do it these days. Maybe I should do something about that.
      The video suggests that the bias towards extroversion is just a recent thing. It shouldn’t be too hard to bring things back into balance by raising awareness of the issue.

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      • My daughter is 18 and read it after I suggested it. She’s really a math/science person and was always frustrated when her English teacher put such emphasis on class participation, which my introverted daughter took issue with. Luckily both teacher and daughter had sense of humor about it.

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      • I always used to hate class participation exercises. I don’t think I ever contributed very much in those situations. However, it probably helped me to get used to being out of my comfort zone, making me a little less timid. Maybe. 🙂

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      • I DO think that’s true! I found it helped me a lot in my life.

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  4. Excellent talk. When I taught, if I saw a kid working alone I’d ask “are you being excluded or are like me — you like to work alone? The kid never verbally needed to respond. As soon as I got to the “like me” and “alone” they’d let out a big sigh that someone got it. 😀

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  5. First of all, Sarah, You are not an Introvert! As soon as Your thoughts have come out on the pages, You become an Extrovert too! And that is what We need, a Mixture of Both. One without the Other, Any one, is a Waste! Love.

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  6. Thank you for visiting my blog. I haven’t seen you for a long time.

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    • Sorry, I was taking a break from blogging for a bit. It’s hard to find the time to do everything that needs to be done at the moment. At least I’m never bored!

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  7. Yes, I like Swami’s comment. By blogging you are finding the balance Sarah! 🙂

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    • It’s a lot easier for me to be extroverted on the Internet. When it all gets too much I can just unplug and get some peace! I think my blogging break is over for now. I hope you’re enjoying yours (although I notice, like me, you haven’t been able to resist writing a few posts).
      I hope your neighbour is recovering well and that her family are coping okay.

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      • I am an extreme introvert. There’s something about blogging that makes introverts seem …. chatty? True, America is obsessed with extroverts. My friend became an alumni interviewer for the college we attended. On the list of questions they gave her to evaluate students, one of the questions was, “What has this student shown in the way of leadership qualities?” Why does everyone have to show “leadership qualities”? Can’t good grades and test scores be enough? Does everyone have to be the class president? I wonder if I would even get into my own college these days … rejected for no “leadership qualities.”

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      • Imagine if everyone in a room was a leader. Who would get the work done?!

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  8. Haha, too funny and too true!

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  9. I think lots of people confuse shyness and being an introvert. I’m not shy — I’ve got no problem standing up for myself and leading if I need to BUT given the choice I prefer to work alone rather than in a group/committee. Most of the time I feel more recharged spending time alone rather than with other people. When I am with a group — I am more comfortable with a small group where I can focus on each person in the group rather than a lot of random energy surrounding me like at a rowdy party or bar setting.

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    • You’re right. People don’t understand that introversion and shyness are not the same thing.
      I’m introverted _and_ shy. 🙂 People keep telling me I’m not but they don’t know what I put myself through to be with them.
      My favourite way to interact is one-on-one in a quiet setting. It hardly ever happens! Except maybe on the Internet!

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  10. Sarah, this debate reminds me of an article I read in the papers a couple of weeks back…. About why introverts are more suited for missions to Mars, and how unsuitable extroverts are! It’s pretty interesting. Do check it out on the internet. It makes an interesting read!

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  11. I would rather be an introvert and extrovert. Lucky me! But I’m glad that people are talking about the gifts of introversion now.

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    • Being both would be great. I’m still trying to get to the point where I’m comfortable with only being one. Videos like this help. 🙂
      Thanks for your comment.

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  12. Being either is not a problem. We tend to more comfortably view ‘the other’ through our lenses of preference. Not one week ago, someone labeled me an extroverted introvert. 🙂

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    • Absolutely: everybody should be able to feel comfortable with wherever they lie on the introvert-extrovert spectrum.
      Would you agree with the label you were given or are you implying that it says more about the labeller than it says about you?

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  13. I remember how my kids used to dread working in groups in school. Lately I’ve been realizing that, for most of my life, I’ve been nudging myself away from my natural tendency toward introversion. That nudging has resulted in some very rewarding and fun experiences, but now I know it’s okay to honor my desire and longing for time alone. Thank you for posting this! It’s very affirming.

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    • I’m so glad that you got something positive from this post. Thanks for taking the time to comment.
      I think introverts benefit from a bit of nudging as long as it doesn’t come with a sense that it’s not okay to want to be alone sometimes. I’m gradually getting over that. 🙂

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  14. Great post & comments! I am ….both! I am happy to see you walking around my place…Thank you!

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  15. The book, Quiet, that Susan Cain wrote is fascinating. As a highly sensitive person, I found a lot to think about and good things at that. Thank you so much for reading my post so I could peek at yours. All the Best!

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  16. Hi Sarah, I’m both, Happy in a group and happy alone, but not too happy if I’m alone too long; I definitely need the company of other people after a while to feel alive and contented.

    Thanks for visiting my blog and liking my posts. 🙂

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  17. I’d leave a comment but I don’t want to reveal my subjective psychical content. 😉

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